Posts : 47
Location : sweltering hot Texas
|Subject: weird school dreams Tue Mar 08, 2011 2:03 am|| |
I know I've been a real prodigal lately . . . well, for the past few months . . . sorry y'all. Sometimes I just don't know how to get back here without raising eyebrows or inflicting shock and questions about where I've been and what I've been up to . . . oh well, I'm rambling now.
On the subject of dreams, I have been having some really weird ones, and btw, I AM back in school, kind of like a certificate program for medical front/back office since it seems like it's the only kind of job I can get into, but sorry I'm getting off topic again . . . my school dreams are not exactly about the classes I'm in now, that's just what makes them all the more weird. I dream of my former university a lot . . . sometimes I dream about high school even if it was over a decade ago. Usually I'm lost . . . I have some kind of new schedule and the building is located across town and I was able to get there, but for some reason I don't have a ride later and I just KNOW my parents will kill me for being super late to get home . . . sometimes I start walking home, but I'm freaked out because I don't exactly know how to get home that way or I'm just freaked out. Sometimes my husband is there, but it's like we're just students, not married, or maybe we are married, but we live with my parents and it all took place when I was still at uni. It's just weird . . . unsettling. There's other related themes to be dreams, but it's like my subconscious could never get over the whole experience of school and I'm having this continual PTSD that I'm still there and I'm going to be in trouble either for some assignment or my parents or I'm just lost and can't find a class or my way back.
I've been thinking a lot about you guys . . . I really miss y'all. I didn't intend to be away like this, I just didn't have internet for a month, we moved apartments, then I started school and the feeling was weird . . . I just lost the will to post or something . . . and not just here, but like all across the board--facebook, yahoo, other forums I used to visit, etc. I just lost touch completely. Maybe that's what all the weird dreams are about. I know I ought to visit and post, I know I should write to my friends . . . I just went inward and it's hard to get out of myself. You know what I mean? And age-wise, I'm going through a weird denial at school. I remember when I was 18 and going to this community college, and now I'm nearly 30 and I don't know how to accept this version of myself. I remember who I was back then, and I can't say I'm very much the same, but a part of me is still that girl and I don't know how to reconcile the two selves.
Ok. I'll shut up for now. Maybe this should have been placed in "Rant and Rave". Well, it is about dreams somewhat.
Thanks for listening y'all. How are you guys btw?